Archive for December, 2012

My review of Laird Hunt’s Kind one is online now at Green Mountains Review. Check it out. Then check out the book itself.

am i the first to wonder whether disney movies are propaganda for the windsors? perhaps those princess movies explain our preposterous fascination with british royalty.

pigAfter the jihad flattens American culture, we’re going to regret the end of barbecue. That became clear last week. The Wife and I travelled from Jacksonville, FL to Louisville, KY and back. To make the road trip palatable, we turned it into a brief tour of barbecue establishments in northern Georgia and Tennessee. Besides Texas, Tennessee and the counties of states in the vicinity of Tennessee house the greatest barbecue joints in the country. Should you ever make it to this part of the map, here are some places of note:

Pig N Chik (Atlanta, Ga): The Pig N Chik is worth visiting for their mustard sauce, which goes brilliantly with their brisket. The pulled pork was a little bland, but at least it wasn’t shredded in the manner common to chain barbecues. The biggest downside to the Pig N Chik is that it’s in Atlanta and you have to deal with Atlanta’s distinctly anti-human traffic. Plus it’s in a strip mall.

Martin’s (Nolensville, TN). Good God, I love Martin’s. The Wife and I shared the Big Momma Sampler of ribs, chicken, pulled pork, and brisket. It’s been a long time since I’ve eaten that much meat, but I felt fine afterward. Even Thanksgiving didn’t make me grin so gluttonously. Nolensville is a little outside Nashville. If you’re willing to travel a short ways into the Tennessee country, you’ll make your belly happy. I shall return for their redneck taco.

Stone House Q (Nashville, TN). The Stone House Q is a lovely place, particularly if you love sausage. The sampler is designed for one person, but that person is extremely large. The Wife and I were able to share one with more than satisfactory results. The Stone House Q was the only restaurant we visited which served sausage on their sampler. It was too salty for The Wife, but I dug its secret sweetness. They also served the best baked beans of the lot, if you’re actually interested in sides.

A road trip really is the best way to feel American: much better than waving a flag or voting or attending a ball game. This country has such fine and varied geographies and cultures and cuisines. I get reminded of that any time I travel by car. Even Tennessee, maybe especially Tennessee, whose college and pro teams play a brand of football that is as inept as it is unattractive, whose hills are likely replete with inbred thousands if not millions, has a unique beauty to offer. I’ve seen similar beauties along the gulf coast of Mississippi and the badlands of South Dakota, places too many folks take too many pains to avoid. But go there. See those lands. Taste those foods. That’s how you can connect to this country at the physical level. The real thing is much better than that fool Kerouac could ever describe and probably, now that I think of it, too strong for al-Quaeda to end.

the saddest dialogue ever.

Posted: December 3, 2012 in but whatever

“you’re not old, pactor.”

“man, you’ve never seen me after 9:30pm. that’s when i look well-suited for a cane, Medicare check, and worry over the lawn.”